Gators in the Sewers -- An Excerpt
by Tina Jens
When Phoebe saw the baby alligator swimming in her soup, she realized she was quite mad.
It was homemade vegetable. The soup, that is. Made from the last pickings of a late garden. Which is to say, a few scrawny potatoes, a rogue carrot and lots of onions.
The alligator -- yes, it was still there -- had climbed upon an onion log and was sunning itself in the glare of the bare, 90 watt bulb that hung over the kitchen table.
The alligator yawned widely, exposing a mouth full of tiny, pointed teeth -- about the size of sewing needles, but not nearly so long. Suddenly, the little thing snapped its jaws, ripping a fleshy hunk out of an unsuspecting creature floating past. The surprisingly loud snap scared Phoebe, and she jumped back in her chair with an "Oh!"
The vicious attack on the innocent canned mushroom was a good reminder that while tiny, the alligator was still a wild, dangerous creature...
The doctor looked up from the psychiatric review file. "What makes you say that, Tony?"
"Just look where I am," he gestured at his surroundings in an oddly feline way. "A psych ward. Healthy tigers live at the zoo or in the jungle. Or sometimes, at the circus. But they don't like that -- there's too much traveling involved."
"I see," said the doctor.
"Of course, the zoo would never take me, because I don't have a tail, and the kids would cry when they saw a tail-less tiger, parents would stop bringing their kids to the zoo, profits would fall, and pretty soon they'd have to close the zoo. Where would the tigers live then? You can't go back to the jungle after you've lived the zoo life. Damn those doctors!"
The doctor had followed the odd line of logic up until that last bit. "Why do you blame the doctors, Tony?"
"Because they cut off my tail. They did it the same time they circumcised me. My parents never knew."
It made the doctor uncomfortable to admit it, but the man really did look like a tiger...
The demon jabbed the dagger deep into the old woman's heart, then spun around on her chest to catch the spurting blood in its mouth. A human drinking fountain!
His forked tongue was tinged a deep red. Blood had the same properties as Electric Cherry Kool-aid to the little green demon. And Henry wasn't worried about getting stains on the carpet.
As the pressure fell on the geyser, the demon stabbed the woman again and giggled happily to itself.
He should have called some friends and thrown a party. There was enough blood here for a vampire, a ghoul, or a dozen demons, fer sure. But he was a greedy little thing. And his friends would've just shoved him aside and taken all the best veins and arteries for themselves.
Heh. Better to grind up the remains and feed it to the little, yappy, bedroom-slipper of a dog. See if he could wake the carnivorous canine that lay slumbering in the pampered pooch's genes.
He planned to eat the dog, too. But not until he'd had some fun. The finicky mutt ate only canned food and little doggie treats. The canine equivalent to a vegetarian.
Pffft! Vegetarian blood was yucky!
HORRORS! 365 SCARY STORIES, is available in most bookstores. If your store doesn't carry it, ask them to order it.
Phoebe wondered where its mother was. She had jumped to the conclusion that it was a baby, based solely on its size. But considering its current location, there were infinite possibilities. Phoebe chose not to consider them just now.
I'm A Crazy Tiger -- An Excerpt
by Tina Jens
"Doctor, I'm afraid I'm a crazy tiger."
Demon Bender -- An Excerpt
by Tina Jens
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